We're Back!

We're baaaaack...!! It's election time in America again, which means it's prime time for nuts, dicks, and boobs! Please feel free to welcome us back by sending any sort of food or - of course - tube socks. Also, it would be fun if you would leave some comments. (Unless, of course, they're negative comments. I mean - who needs that?)

Friday, December 3, 2010

Return of The Beverly Hillbillies

All the infighting that's been going on in the GOP recently reminds me a lot of "The Beverly Hillbillies." You remember - Jed Clampett and his hillbilly clan found some "black gold - Texas tea" and moved to Beverly - Hills, that is. Swimming pools. Movie stars. The contrast between the Clampetts and the staid white rich folks provided plenty of comedic fodder. Both groups had to find a way to get along, though, because the Clampetts had a ton of money, and thus they suddenly also had influence.

Nearly fifty years later, the tea party movement finds itself playing the part of the Clampetts. Teabaggers have invaded the turf of the rich, white, country club Republicans who, despite their obvious differences with the tea party, feel compelled to find a way to get along with them - seeing as how they represent a potentially significant GOP voting bloc and all.

This is the dynamic that goes a long way to explaining how Sarah Palin (you know, she does kinda remind me of Elly May) feels compelled to call Barbara Bush a "blue blood" and disses Ronald Reagan as being merely "an actor." It's a cultural clash within the party that has many wondering if the two factions can really work together or if they're headed for a nasty divorce.

There are plenty of warning calls being heard these days. County club Republicans like Joe Scarborough are warning that the party had better "man up" and do something to stop Palin and the anti-intellectualism that she represents from taking the reins of power away from them. In a savage op-ed he slams the former half-term governor as "a reality star who cannot be elected." Other country club types, like Karl Rove, have joined in the chorus of naysayers who appear to be alarmed at Palin's influence within the party.

All of this, of course, just makes Sister Sarah's hillbilly army all that more enamored of her. Anyone who dares to point out that the empress has no clothes is labeled an "elite" and summarily dismissed. Palin could tweet that the world is ending tomorrow and her adoring worshippers would ask her what they should wear.

Democrats, meanwhile, can just sit back and enjoy the show. They're praying that she will run in 2012 - betting that when she inevitably loses in the primaries, her followers will be so devastated and angry that they'll stay home on election day. Personally, I think that there's a better than even chance that she'll do a Perot and run independently - which of course would be a sure-fire recipe to ensure Obama's re-election.

But who knows, I could be wrong. Maybe the country club types will find a way to embrace their tea party brethren and they'll all sing Kumbaya around the ce-ment pond together. But if I were Mr. Drysdale, I wouldn't bet the bank on it.

Friday, November 19, 2010

Palin Girls Gone Wild!

Ah, Facebook! A great place for teens to hit the keyboard and throw around a few homophobic slurs to let off steam. It also works as a great showcase for the very best the American educational system has to offer - grammar skills, spelling and word choices have never been better represented!

To illustrate my point, one need look no further than this week's Facebook exchange between Willow Palin, the 16-year-old wunderkind who calls her mother Sarah, and a gaggle of her classmates. The subject at hand is the new reality show starring the Palin Family - "Sarah Palin's Alaska." Apparently not everyone at Willow's school is a fan of the show - and Willow wasn't going to stand for that! With a little assistance from big sister Bristol, she let loose with the big guns, calling the offender a "faggot" and even managing to drop a couple of F-bombs along the way. You can read the entire exchange here. I don't want to dwell on it - I have a bigger point to make. Which is...

If I recall correctly, Sister Sarah had her panties in a bunch a few months ago because Rahm Emanuel used the word "retarded" in a private meeting. She cranked up the outrage machine to its highest level and demanded that the president fire him. And yet, here it is - a couple of days later and, except for a half-hearted one-sentence apology from Bristol for "reacting to negative comments about our family" - still no word from anyone in the Palin family about the use of the word "faggot" to insult her classmate. Apparently it's just not that big of a deal, I guess. Why else would Sarah remain silent on the subject? I guess the NOH8 campaign that's been all over the news recently hasn't made it to Alaska yet. Maybe they aren't aware of the rash of suicides among young people who have been the victims of these kinds of homophobic slurs. Well, Alaska is kind of far away, I guess.

I suspect that Sarah, however, is probably just too busy with her next Facebook message - which no doubt will attack the media for saying all those nasty things about her precious little girl. I bet she'll even manage to say something nasty about David Letterman again!

And by the way - someone should probably explain to these young 'uns that when you write something on the Internet, EVERYBODY can read it - a point that should probably be right in the front of your brain if you have a loud-mouthed "family values" mother who fantasizes about being president.

In any event, it's apparent to me that the Palin girls have been skipping their Sunday School classes. Maybe they quit going because quitting runs in the family.

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Bush Throws Mitch McConnell Under the Bus

(Rachel Maddow explains why Mitch McConnell is a giant hypocrite.)

Mitch McConnell is the Republican leader in the United States senate. He also looks exactly like a turtle. I know he can't help how he looks, but can you really trust someone who looks like a turtle? I think not.

Now, I haven't found many opportunities to thank George W. Bush for something he did - but in this case I tip my hat to the man for exposing the rank hypocrisy of this man-turtle named McConnell. Of course, Bush had his own selfish reasons for throwing McConnell under the bus - it was a transparent attempt to make himself look like the good guy - but still, by telling the world of this brazen bit of hypocrisy, he's actually done us a favor, I suppose.

You can watch the video above for all the particulars - Rachel Maddow does her usual superb job of explaining the story. But the bottom line is that back in 2006, McConnell wanted Bush to bring home some of the troops from Iraq as a way to benefit Republicans in the election - while at the same time excoriating Democrats and calling them nasty names for pushing for the exact same withdrawal. Of course, Democrats were advocating the withdrawal on policy grounds, arguing that it was the best policy for the national security. McConnell was advocating withdrawal for political reasons, to help the Republicans in the election - national security be damned. To him, our soldiers were just pawns in his sleazy little chess game.

For me, the whole sordid tale just reinforces the fact that the Iraq war was nothing but a giant sham, orchestrated by politicians for their own benefit. It was (and is) a national tragedy that could have, should have, been prevented and which, despite the sacrifice of American lives and treasure (not to mention the 100,000 dead Iraqis), has left us virtually nothing to show for it. So I'd like to retract my earlier "thank you" to the former president. Thanks for nothing, George W. Bush. 

Monday, November 15, 2010

Cindy McCain Wants to Repeal DADT - or Not!

So Cindy McCain, the wife of the senator who just missed being president by only a gazillion votes, steps up to the plate and appears in the above video. It's an anti-bullying message with numerous celebrities appearing to add their voices to the NOH8 campaign. In the video, she is clearly onboard with the cause, and even makes reference to the Don't Ask Don't Tell policy of the U.S. military ("They [gays] can't serve our country openly.")

As the wife of the senator who's leading the fight against repeal of DADT, the NOH8 campaign seemed to have scored a major coup by landing Cindy McCain's support for their cause. McCain's daughter, Megan, is also a strong supporter of the NOH8 campaign. So imagine everyone's surprise when Cindy took to the Twitter machine with this message:

"I fully support the NOH8 campaign and all it stands for and am proud to be a part of it. But I stand by my husband's stance on DADT."

So wait. What? She's against the military telling gays they can't serve openly, but she supports her husband's stance that the military should tell gays they can't serve openly? Amazing. That's kind of like saying, "I fully support animal rights, but I stand by puppy torturers." Maybe someone should tell her that simultaneously holding two opposing viewpoints can result in massive confusion for everyone.

Cindy is now bearing witness to a rather sizable backlash from people who are angry and disappointed at what appears to be a stab in the back to the NOH8 campaign - and has left many people speculating that her husband "got to her" and persuaded her to publicly back him in his gallant struggle to keep hate alive. (I'm guessing it was the old "horse head in the bed" trick.) Maybe, just maybe, Cindy McCain is supporting the anti-bullying campaign because she's married to a bully.

Friday, November 5, 2010

A Little Fact-Checking Goes a Long Way!

(VIDEO: Rachel Maddow explains about crazy people.)

Today's Right-Wing Meme of the Day goes something like this: Oh My God! Obama is going overseas and it's going to cost the taxpayers a gazillion dollars a day! Not only that, but we're sending the entire navy to protect him and half of Canada's navy, too!! OMG!! OMG!!

This latest nonsense began when the oh-so-lovely Michele Bachmann of Minnesota, aka The Queen of the Crazy Ladies, got on CNN and told a Paul Bunyon-esque tall tale to Anderson Cooper. She said that it would cost $200 million a day for Obama's trip. When Cooper challenged her on that comically large number, Bachmann defended herself by saying that the "the numbers have been coming out in the press."

Cooper: "And do you believe everything you read in the press?"
Bachmann: "Well, you're the press. Shouldn't I believe you?"
Cooper: "I'm not reporting that this trip is costing $200 million a day."

Of course, it took CNN about two seconds to do some fact-checking and determine that Michele Bachmann - true to form - was full of shit. But not before the story had spread to all the sleazy corners of right-wing world: Limbaugh, Hannity, Beck, et al. confirming with each other that the story was, like, totally true.

Apparently the story had originated on some Indian website and was picked up by the very prestigious Drudge Report, which apparently was way too busy to find out if the story was actually, you know, true or not. Well, that was the cue for Right-Wing World to go straight into fake scandal mode - something they've become quite accomplished at - and start screaming hysterically that the world is coming to an end.

Well, of course the story wasn't true. For one thing, the government doesn't release the figures on presidential trips abroad for security reasons, so nobody knows how much money will be spent - certainly not some snake charmer in India. (A similar trip by President Clinton, however, cost about $50 million - for the whole trip, NOT per day).

The sane media needs to do a better job of policing these scoundrels and doing some serious fact-checking when they say stupid shit. Anderson Cooper often does a good job challenging his guests. He went straight after Bachmann as soon as she uttered her inanities. And of course Rachel Maddow, as always, does an excellent job exposing these frauds.

It's amazing to me that FOX News continues to perpetuate this fraudulent activity. Hasn't anyone told them that real journalists are supposed to check their stories before they publish or broadcast them? Don't politicians know that a little fact-checking goes a long way? It could actually save them from looking like a total ass the next day.